Stop and be Present

They may forget what you said, 

but they never forget how you made them feel.

Carl Buechner

I came across this on one of my favorite blogs Clover Lane and she couldn't have said it better.  

I love this quote.  More today than ever, I think all of us mothers need to hear it. 

I sometimes feel sorry for our children.  I am sure our mothers had their own distractions, but it can't be anything compared to what we have today.  Not only are we expected to do so much more in addition to raising our children and keeping our house, we also have so many more opportunities to be distracted by technology: phones, email, the internet.

And no matter how convenient all this technology makes our lives, it also pulls us away from the stuff that really matters.  We all know it is no fun to talk to someone who is constantly being disrupted by a cell phone, or to carry on a conversation with someone whose mind is elsewhere.  How can children feel differently?  They know when we are really listening, and we know that children thrive with real attention...the kind where we are not just present physically but mentally as well.  Do we make them feel important when we are multi-tasking them into our lives? How many moments are we missing with so many distractions?   Do they feel like a priority when they see us unavailable to them because we are on the phone, or on the computer?  Are we constantly rushing them because we have a million places to go or a long list of to-do's?   

This little quotation is a reminder to us all I think.  It is a call to slow down, it is a call to log off, it is a call to leave that cell phone unanswered, to STOP and listen to our children, to be PRESENT.  When we are not distracted all day long, we have the ability to be engaged with our families.  When we are engaged with our families, we are more calm and centered and tuned in to our children.  Our children feel worthy of our attention and love.  And that's the feeling they will carry with them into adulthood, and never forget.  

One of my goals this summer is to be "unplugged" which means no TV or computer during the day.  It has worked pretty well.  We do still do night movies, but we have yet to bum around and watch tv during these beautiful summer days.  I still mess around on my phone but I try to do it only when the kids are busy doing something else out of the room.  

I have been trying to be more "present".  Forget about the dirty dishes, laundry piling up, sprinklers, weeds, etc.  These can wait and will always be there.  My little ones are only little once.  I don't want to miss it.